The Healing Power of Touch

For so many of us, strength means retreating inward during times of discomfort—solving, soothing, and carrying the weight alone. But what if we allowed ourselves to lean into the power of touch? What if the comfort we seek lies not in pulling away, but in connecting?

When I’m upset, overwhelmed, sad, or angry—essentially in states of discomfort—my initial reaction is to retreat. I don’t want to be touched; I want to soothe inward. My partner, on the other hand, communicates love and support first through touch. It’s his instinct. And while I don’t always embrace it, I’m learning to lean into the power of physical connection.

One occasion stands out vividly. I had just received a call about a loved one’s serious illness. The news hit me like a brick—I was scared, overwhelmed, hysterical. My mind raced with worst-case scenarios, and I felt paralyzed by fear.

Luckily, my partner was there. He didn’t know all the details; he couldn’t fix the situation. But he knew what I needed, even before I did. He embraced me.

Long, warm, and comforting, his embrace melted the tension in my body. It reminded me of the safety I had once found as a child in my mother’s arms—her love and protection had always been my anchor. And in that moment, I realized just how essential touch has always been for me.

Somewhere along the way, I had stopped seeking it. Perhaps it was the narrative of strength that taught me to carry on without comfort, without connection. But from my mother to my partner, I’ve been reminded of how vital touch is for me—and for all of us.

As strong women, we often hold so much in our bodies. And that’s why we need healing touch—embraces from parents, lovers, friends, and community. This need isn’t just emotional; it’s physical. Whether through a hug, a grounding massage, even pat on the back or a high five, our bodies crave the healing power of touch.

For some, touch may feel challenging or even unsafe due to past experiences. But when we can find or make space for safe, nurturing touch, it can provide the healing our strength has long required.

Research shows that physical touch triggers the release of oxytocin, often called the "love hormone," which reduces stress and promotes feelings of safety and connection. Studies indicate that touch improves emotional regulation and lowers cortisol levels, making it a powerful tool for healing and resilience.

Safe, nurturing touch can also improve physical health, enhance mood, and deepen bonds, reminding us that connection is a cornerstone of well-being.

This week, explore ways to embrace the healing power of touch in your life:

• Practice intentional touch: Hug a loved one, hold your partner’s hand, or spend quiet time with a pet. These small moments can have a profound impact on your well-being.

• Create a "touch ritual" for yourself: Use grounding practices like self-massage, resting your hands on your heart during moments of stress, or wrapping yourself in a cozy blanket.

• Seek professional touch: Schedule a massage, try physical therapy, or explore other bodywork to reconnect with your body and release tension.

Some Resources:

• Video Recommendation: The Importance and The Power of Human Touch TEDx talk by Judith Ashton

• Journal Prompt: When was the last time you experienced comforting, safe touch? How did it make you feel? What can you do to create more moments like that in your life?

Touch isn’t just physical—it’s healing, emotional, and transformative. When we allow ourselves to receive and embrace touch, we create space for softness and connection. And as we experience the power of touch, we’re reminded to move through the world with that same gentleness and care—for ourselves and for others.

🖤Dr. Akilah

This is part of Dr. Akilah's Rewriting the Narrative of Strength series. Read the entire series here!