Rooted for the Season: Cultural Rituals That Keep Us Steady

The holidays have a way of bringing everything into sharper focus: the joy and the grief, the presence and the absence, the chaos and the calm. As we experience the full spectrum of emotions this season,  our cultural and family traditions can become the anchor, the through-line that keeps us connected to what matters most.

This season, The Black Girl Doctors shared the rituals and traditions that ground them during the holidays. From Christmas mornings in Jamaica to Thanksgiving "tickets to dinner," these stories remind us that our traditions, no matter how big or small, carry the power to root us in legacy, joy, and belonging.

The Magic We Carry Forward

For Dr. Shelly, the holidays will forever be intertwined with memories of Christmas in Jamaica, a season filled with warmth, music, and the incomparable magic her mother created. "I remember those early December mornings, when the Christmas tree would go up weeks before the big day," she shares. "The house would slowly fill with the festive aroma of spices, fruits, and preparations for the feast."

Even as an adult, she'd wake at 6 a.m., unable to shake that childlike thrill. Christmas morning meant family gathered around the table, her mom's famous dishes (ham, rice and peas, oven-baked chicken, sorrel, and egg nog) and the laughter of her brothers filling the house. "It was this deep connection to family, food, and culture that grounded me during the holidays and kept me feeling connected to my roots."

But as her mother's health has declined, the magic has shifted. "Christmas no longer feels the same without her," Dr. Shelly reflects. "Yet, even in the quiet of this new reality, I carry with me those memories of festive warmth." Though this Christmas will be different, she finds comfort in honoring those traditions, keeping them alive in her heart, and sharing them with her own family in whatever ways she can.

Nostalgia in Every Bite

Some traditions live not just in our hearts but on our tongues. For Dr. Keisha, a Guyanese-American, Christmas morning means pepper pot, a savory stew made with casareep, a variety of meats, and warm spices like clove, cinnamon, orange peels, and ginger, served with thick chunks of homemade bread.

"While the look (an almost black soup) is probably not something most people think of for breakfast, this is something I can't do without each year," she says with a laugh. "And whenever I eat it, it is such a nostalgic moment. No matter what is going on or where I am. Christmas isn't Christmas for me without pepper pot."

She admits she can't make it herself, but that's part of the beauty. "I love that my mom will make it every year and makes sure we all get numerous helpings!" It's a tradition that ties her to her Guyanese roots, to her mother's hands, and to the comfort of home, no matter how far away she might be.

Creating New Traditions for the Next Generation

As we grow and our families expand, we also have the opportunity to create new rituals that reflect our current season of life. Dr. Akilah has embraced this beautifully with her son through their Noon Year's Eve celebration.

"Each year, I take my son (and invite family and friends to join) to a local celebration where we ring in the new year at 12 p.m. instead of midnight," she explains. "It's perfect for kids, full of games, crafts, and excitement leading up to the big countdown. When the clock strikes noon, balloons drop, cheers erupt, and families welcome the new year in the daylight."

It's a reminder that new beginnings don't have to wait until midnight, and that joy can be celebrated in ways that meet us exactly where we are. "It's such a joyful, heartwarming way to celebrate," she says.

Making Space for What's Here and What's Gone

The holidays can hold complex emotions, especially for those who've experienced loss. Dr. Gail has found her own way to navigate this terrain with intention and grace.

"Before large family gatherings, I make time to be with myself, usually outside, taking a walk in my favorite park or just some quiet moments at home," she shares. "Having experienced many losses in my immediate family, holiday traditions, though still meaningful, feel different now."

These reflective moments help her acknowledge her bittersweet feelings, connect with her memories, and arrive more present and grateful. "Making space for reflective moments helps me... arrive more present and grateful for all that I have in the here and now." It's a powerful reminder that sometimes our most grounding rituals are the quiet ones, the ones that give us permission to feel everything we need to feel.

Joy, Togetherness, and Ugly Sweaters

Sometimes the best traditions are the ones that prioritize pure, unadulterated fun. For Dr. Jac and her family, that means Chicken and Waffles on Christmas.

"We invite family and friends (anyone is welcome) and the house fills with laughter, music, and the smell of syrup and fried chicken. Everyone wears ugly Christmas sweaters, and the more outrageous, the better," she says.

It's simple, it's joyful, and it's exactly what the season calls for. "This simple ritual keeps us grounded and connected, reminding us that the holidays are really about joy, togetherness, and creating memories."

Your Ticket to Dinner

Some traditions come with requirements. Dr. Tai, the middle child of three daughters, grew up with a Thanksgiving ritual that her mother took very seriously: gratitude as your "ticket to dinner."

"Since we were old enough to say grace, my parents created a tradition where we would all pause before Thanksgiving dinner to share what we were thankful for," she explains. "When we got older, my mom took it up a notch and started handing out index cards so we could write our gratitude down. She called it our 'ticket to dinner,' and she meant it."

Throughout Thanksgiving week, her mother would ask repeatedly, "Do you have your ticket to dinner?" Anyone who joined them had to participate too, so they'd warn their friends to come prepared. "We tested the boundaries a few times, but she was so forreal! No ticket, no dinner lol!"

Over time, it became something they all looked forward to. "During the hardest years, it forced all of us to hone in on all that is right and good when we had spent so much time consumed by grief or pain…we really needed that."

Her mother kept all the cards, and now whenever Dr. Tai is home, she loves going through them, seeing what grounded her over the years. "Now that my sisters and I are all grown with our own families, this tradition still centers me and makes me feel connected to home."

Cooking, Stories, and Something Bigger

For Dr. Amani, the holidays mean gathering in the kitchen, each family member preparing a dish passed down from their elders. As they cook, stories flow about old family gatherings, lessons learned around the table, the people who came before.

"The smells and sounds bring me back to my roots and remind me that I'm part of something bigger than myself," she shares. "No matter how chaotic life feels, these moments of shared laughter, memory, and gratitude help me slow down, stay present, and feel deeply anchored in my family's legacy."

It's a beautiful illustration of how traditions don't just connect us to the past. They anchor us in the present and guide us into the future.

What Roots You?

These stories remind us that our traditions, whether they involve pepper pot or pepper chicken, index cards or ugly sweaters, quiet walks or noisy kitchens, are more than just routines. They're the threads that connect us to our ancestors, our families, our cultures, and ourselves. They're what keep us steady when everything else feels uncertain.

As we move through this holiday season, we invite you to reflect:

• What are the rituals that root you?

• What traditions help you stay present, find joy, make meaning, or honor your legacy?

Whether you're continuing something generations old or creating something brand new, know that these practices matter. They're not just nice-to-haves. They're the anchors that keep us grounded and the bridges that keep us connected.

We'd love to hear your stories. What traditions keep you rooted for the season?